I am reflecting. A fine day such as today calls for a reflection. A day where I get the chance to know more about other’s personality, to get more glimpse into their thought process.
With the way I live my life the past few months, my reflecting time is past due. What comes towards me had a very very big effect on me that I might have not be myself anymore. In short, my circumtances make me change, again, in so short a time. So I need to know myself more, too.
A lot or articles, forum and such from the internet seem to reassure my belief that people in their twenties change every so often. That’s generalitation, of course, I am sure there are people who know who they are by twenty and so do not change that much after. But it makes me feel not so alone, I know there are people who accuse themselves as a wishy washy because what they want for themselves is just so inconsistent, what they want the most for one day is what they hate the most the next week.
That did sounds annoying, but on the flip side, that means a chance to improve, to start anew, every so often. We can choose the new revelations that contribute to the change. We can choose what influence us, what direction we take when presented with a condition. We can change every week. We can be more like our ideal self faster! Says those similar, gimicky motivational speeches.
Sounds too good to be true?
Yeah, for me too.
I see something so clear today that change my perspective : not all people see from my perspective. Yeah, big news, and seems like I am so late in understanding that. But really. There are fundamental elements in us that won’t change no matter what forge we have been going through under. It’s not for us to change.
So is it futile to change ourselves, moreover others, because it is pushing the law of nature? As I hate giving up, I will give the ever so annoying answer, “Maybe”. After all, human have work around forces of nature and pass the boundaries to overcome hurdles before. For many, many years.
And so, who knows? If this fail to take place, maybe it’s true that I am a lazy piece of trash with no will power in me. And I have no power to change that.